It happens all the time. At work, at home and with friends. And it´s easy to blame the others. No no, it´s not you, sure no.....
People are different. We all know it and some times we even say it´s good. Well, until we experience the dark side of the difference. Im am pretty sure you have experienced that some people communicate with you in a way you fine hard to understand. Why do he say it like that, doesn't he understand the topic we discuss? I can't really stand it when she opens her presentation by asking how we are instead of jumping straight in to it....
As a manager I have experienced situations where some of my direct reports have a problem with me. Problem with me? Hard to understand. I do what I think is right and believe in. If they have a problem with me it´s really their problem and I don't really care. I have heard that I am to direct and straight forward, that I don't listen and it seems that I don't really care how "we" are. Have you been there and experience something like this? I can assure you that you are not alone.
People are People (remember the old Depeche Mode song?) and you are you. Sometimes we need to take a reality check to remember who we are, what our behavior looks like for ourselves, and maybe more important sometimes, for others. Being more aware about yourself can create a huge impact on your leadership and on your self being. One of the pioneers within psychology, The Swiss psychotherapist Dr. Carl G. Jung, created a model that can help us to understand ourselves and others. The Jung Typology was presented in his book "Psychological Types" in 1921. Yeah that´s a long time ago, and here we are still working with the model. That in itself are to me proof enough that it was a brilliant model. The model are created around three pair of preferences. (You know preferences? Your preferred way of doing things.) It´s excellent, and easy to understand when presented in the right way.
Now back to you. Understanding your preferences can help you to discover the uniqueness within you, and as a consequence it will help you to understand others as well. Try to think about (or imagine) that you connect just a little bit better with those who report to you, just because you have a little more understanding about who you are (your preferences). Maybe you understand why she always asks how are you in the beginning of her presentation instead of using energy being irritated. And it might be that you see why some see you as a little to direct and straight forward.
It´s easy, and we call it Colorfull Teamtypes©. You discover yourself.
Read more about what we do and how we do it at www.teamhuset.no/tjenester